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We all have been there before. Whether it is a night on the town with the guys or flying solo running errands-a beautiful woman crosses your path and all you want to do is stroll over to her, introduce yourself, and initiate a spontaneous, yet meaningful, conversation that showcases your personality and builds her attraction to you. To put it more simply, you just want to extend this chance meeting to multiple, planned encounters.
Within a span of five minutes, how do you prove to a complete stranger that you are worthy of spending additional time with?
It doesn’t sound so easy when you put this scenario in these terms.
I used to be the guy who had no chance with a beautiful woman. Many times, the woman I would approach would be driven to utter boredom with my pointless banter or, even worse, would look for any escape route possible because I did not having anything meaningful to say after the simple, but painstakingly planned out, “Hello”.
Even worse than that pathetic imitation of Casanova, most times, I would not approach the “unapproachable” beautiful woman because I did not believe she would be interested because she either wanted to be left alone, had a boyfriend (or girlfriend), or I was not “in her league” for whatever the reason.
Simply put, I was a complete mess when it came to women. I might as well have used note cards like George McFly…
I am ecstatic to tell you that after some research, soul-searching, and, of course, some trial and error, I have been able to evolve into a man that is not intimidated by beautiful women, but a man that leaves beautiful women wanting to know more about me. In fact, I have had gorgeous women ask me for my number just from the small, chance interaction we shared.
How did this happen?
I basically used this handy acronym to remind myself what I needed to do approach beautiful women, whether they were my age or ten years younger than me.
Here is what you should remember…
The acronym that I use is PRIDE. Oddly enough, I find the acronym to be appro po because you need to have pride in yourself when you approach the “unapproachable woman”. Think of this way, why would a woman want to be with a man that has no pride in himself. They want someone who is confident, shows leadership, and has a great deal of pride in their work and themselves. Makes sense to me…
P-Proactive-You need to be proactive in this situation. Please understand that I do not mean that you should go to local malls scouring the establishments for the first beautiful woman you find. I simply mean that you need to be prepared. You need to think at any moment, you can come across a beautiful woman.
Every time you go out, you need to have a mindset that you will meet a woman that you just need to approach. With this being said, you need to have your game in line. You need to know what you want to say, how you want to say it (including body language), and what you can say to make the woman you seek interested in you. Down to every detail. Including how you will walk up to a woman (taking larger stride in your gait shows your confident).
Think about the NFL. The coaching staffs of these teams game plan for hours upon hours to ensure that no detail is left uncovered. You need to have this same mentality. Not saying you should spend hours on this prep, but you need to be mindful of the situation!
R-Remove Mental Obstacles-You need to have the ability to remove mental obstacles such as the thought that the woman would not be interested in you or she is too beautiful for you. Guess what, many men think the same way, so why not make yourself unique?
Just recently, I approached an extremely attractive woman at a book store. After the brief introduction, I made a simple joke about the subject of the books that she was looking at as they were men’s health books (she was looking for one for her father). I ended up getting her number and in my subsequent conversations with her, she confided that she does not get hit on as much as one would think. She concluded that men found her difficult to approach. Lucky me…
Additionally, once those mental obstacles are out of the way, you will find yourself developing automaticity when approaching women. There will be no hesitation and this will show the woman you have confidence in your skills.
Lastly, once these obstacles have tumbled down, you will find yourself approaching more and more women. If you are lucky, you will be making progress with the women you meet. But, more importantly, you will be building a “beautiful woman immunity” so to speak. Beautiful women like men who are comfortable with beautiful women. When you seem like you have approached gorgeous woman before and are not flustered by their beauty, this tells the woman that you have experience with beautiful women and you are not intimidated by them. This gender role portrayal is extremely important to your success!
I-Improvisation-So now you have initiated the conversation, now you have to be able to improvise. Women love spontaneity. You need to be aware of your surroundings and the people that are components of it. Women want the total package. They want confidence. They want security. They want a man with a sense of humor. Don’t be afraid to make a playful joke about her or even yourself. Laughing is contagious and it shows the woman that you are secure in yourself, quick-witted, and just an enjoyable person to be around. Women don’t want a boring man.
D-Distinguish Yourself-You don’t have a long window to prove to a lovely woman that you are unique and worthy of her time. Within that window, you need to interject some aspect of you that is interesting and appealing. The simple, “How are you?” conversations are not going to get you as far as you would like. Unless your Brad Pitt or George Clooney.
Just recently, I have taken up the activity of paddle boarding. I needed a new hobby. I found it relaxing and enjoying and it’s a great work out for your core. Anyways, I was talking with a woman I just recently met at a social gathering and she commented about the weather. I quickly quipped, “I hope the weather is like this tomorrow as I was planning on going paddle boarding.” This simple comment precipitated the interest of the woman and she started to ask me about my new hobby. I had her number five minutes later with plans for a date at the beach the next weekend.
I am planning on taking sky diving lessons next…
E-Evolve-You need to understand that it’s not going to go well all the time. I compare approaching woman to the game of Black Jack. Yes, it is a gamble. But, it is a gamble yo must take. The odds are against you and you will most likely lose more hands than you win. However, you can still come out on top if you play your cards and chips right when you get that ideal hand.
Don’t ever get down on yourself. If this was easy, we would all have dates every night of the week. Face it, you are going to be rejected. Look at each situation as one for growth and learning. Just like all parts of life, you need to continuously improve. You will find your own routine and discover what works for you and what does not. You will improve with each experience. I did and I am better for it.
Other items to consider…
*I prefer to meet and approach “unapproachable” women in “real-life situations”, not at clubs or crowded bars. Yes, you can meet women at these establishments, but how memorable can you be with all the distractions around? Now, if you meet a beautiful woman at a coffee shop or restaurant or the beach, you have a situation where you can be somewhat isolated which allows you the opportunity to build your value.
*Don’t forget to introduce yourself to the ladies guy friends. You have to remember that these girls are friends with guys and these guys are not going to like when you don’t strike up conversations with them. Plus, it shows the women that you can strike up a convo with the alpha males and not be intimidated by them.
*For those wanting to know more on how to successfully approach and, more importantly, build a relationship with a desirable woman, I would highly suggest this Video:
Although the title is a bit “Over The Top”, there is some valuable info on approaches, body language, and building attraction with the women you aspire to meet.